They say it like it’s a bad thing.
Obviously, they have never tried squirrel-on-a-stick.
“The Conservatives are... essentially allowing roadkill-ready meat into the food supply,” fumes Welland MP Malcolm Allen. Our Mark Dunn calls him the NDP’s “meat and vegetable critic.”
Here’s what is stuck in Allen’s craw: The Canadian Food Inspection Agency wants to allow consumption of some farm animals put down before they get to an official slaughterhouse — such as a steer with a broken leg.
The agency says this would not effect safety. The unfortunate beast would still be inspected before going to that great alfalfa field in the sky.
The farmer is spared a financial loss, there’s more hamburger for us, and heart surgeons are guaranteed full employment.
Agriculture Minister Gerry Ritz calls Allen’s reaction “outrageous rhetoric.”
Great gobs of greasy, grimy gopher guts! Outrageous rhetoric on Parliament Hill?!
Much worse, if you ask me, is the vicious, unwarranted attack on a whole category of cuisine. Roadkill.
This is especially timely, since many of us are headed north for Victoria Day.
Cottage country is a cornucopia of the crushed. All manner of ready-made meals have emerged disoriented from their winter lairs and crossed to the other side, so to speak.
The thought of tucking into barbecued woodchuck makes you upchuck? Why? What’s the difference if, say, your venison was brought down by a bolt-action Remington or a Buick Regal? True, roadkill is not the smartest bunny in the forest. Otherwise, it would have waited for the light to change.
But it’s as organic as food can get. It’s usually lean, bursting with vitamins and minerals, and less likely to contain additives, though beware ear tags left by biologists. You might break a tooth. (Ed. note: Warning. Strobel has absolutely no training in veterinary science or food inspection.The Sun bears no responsibility.)
Okay, Kimosabe, a couple of cautions: Don’t eat anything you didn’t hit yourself or at least see hit. And look in its eyes. If they’re open and seem angry, run away and order pizza. But there’s no beating roadkill for price, assuming your fender is not too badly dented. It cuts out the international food cartels. The NDP should be glad.
What an unforgettable dining experience.
Ask Michelle Higgins, 47, of Newfoundland, who bagged a moose with her Chrysler Sebring last week but has no memory of it. She drove to work with her windshield and her face busted up like a G20 protester. The late moose left Michelle bloodied, covered in moose hairs, with a hoofprint on her head.
I hope she at least gets some barbecued Bullwinkle out of it. With a nice merlot. Buckets of it, to deaden the pain. To the NDP and others who scoff at roadkill: You’re flat-out wrong. I reach legendary roadside diner Buck Peterson near Seattle, Wash. Buck is the Jamie Kennedy of roadkill — from the classic Original Road Kill Cookbook (1985) to the recent Quick-Fix Cooking With Roadkill. (See buckpeterson.com)
“The issue is large and getting larger as our road networks expand.” he tells me. “We’re pushing more into their habitat than ever before. “Many states down here are trying to deal with roadkill.” For instance, Alaska has a charity moose call list. They phone when car and moose collide.
“Want it?” they ask. So, pull up a chair and tuck in, Michelle. Nothing beats moose meat. It’s so lean, you have to be careful not to over-grill. Raccoon is delicious, too, Buck says. Cut it up, soak it in milk overnight and panfry. Serve with a shiraz. You could eat like a king in Toronto, Buck.
What’s raccoon taste like?
Well, let’s kill two birds with one stone. Canada geese are common roadkill — or should be. Any ideas, Buck? “Some people like it smoked. They make jerky out of it, or as a base for gravy. “But the best roadkill bird I ever had was a feral peacock that had been released from a zoo.” Peacock, eh? Now there’s roadkill that seems right up the NDP’s street.
To order your copy of Roadkill Cookbook, CLICK HERE
Article source: torontosun.com